Never raise a child in a "garbage dump"

/August 2022

I saw such a news a few days ago.

Xiaojie, an 11-year-old boy from Hangzhou, tried to go out to find his mother under an excuse, but he didn't come home all night after leaving home.

later, with the help of the police, the parents did not find Xiao Jie until 7 o'clock the next morning.

asked him why he ran away, but it was because he couldn't stand what his father did at home.

when I want to play with my father for a while, my father always says impatiently, "I'm busy. I'm busy."

but sometimes he wants to play games for a while, but he is scolded by his father and threatens to beat him.

when he thought of this, he was angry and aggrieved. He didn't want to see his father, so he simply "ran away from home".

some netizens commented:

Home is the first school in a child's life, and his parents are his first teachers.

sadly, too many parents ignore the impact of their living habits and words and deeds on their children.

if you want your child to grow up healthily, you should never raise a child in a "garbage dump".


your garbage habits

are seeping into your child's blood

are there any such parents around you?

said countless times that children should not play with their mobile phones and concentrate on their studies, but they watch TV and play games at home every day;

ask their children to watch their mouths and not to swear, but they can chat by themselves and open their mouths if they don't like them;

tell their children to behave and be civilized, but as soon as they go out, parents take the lead in violating traffic regulations.

parents can't even control their daily bad habits; how can children who are too young to tell right from wrong be able to regulate themselves and be educated?

A performance of Lei Lei, a 5-year-old boy, in the parent-child variety show "Don't underestimate me" was unexpected.

when he saw the other children quarreling in the classroom, he immediately excitedly pointed at each other and scolded:

the teachers present were stunned, and the parents in the observation room could not help looking at Lei Ma. Wonder why Lei Lei is exported as "dirty"?

after a patient inquiry by the trainee instructor, Lei Lei finally told the truth:

it turns out that he often hears his mother say similar things at home.

in the mother's opinion, saying "get out" doesn't really want him to "get out". It's just for fun. She wants to play with her children and fight each other.

unexpectedly, Lei Lei could not judge the "right and wrong" in this sentence at all. Under the influence of his mother, he also communicated with his companions in the same way.

in the end, it not only destroys the relationship with peers, but also becomes an uneducated "bad" child.

most of the children's bad behavior is related to the demonstration of their parents.

the bad habits you don't care about will seep into your child's blood and become a cancer in your child's life over a long period of time.

as Mo Yan said:

now many parents blame their children's bad habits on the school, on the teacher, on the child, but not on themselves.

the top priority now is not to educate children, but to educate parents.

in order to cultivate children's good self-cultivation and establish correct values for their children, parents must first take good care of their own words and deeds.

be strict with yourself in front of the child and set an example in order to truly become the guide and leader in the child's life.


your trash emotion

is flowing into your child's body

once saw a blogger on Weibo asking:

"what's the scariest kind of parents you've ever seen?"

the most highly liked is

when dissatisfied with the child, the first reaction is to scold and fight, bringing a storm of anger to the child.

my mother was dissatisfied with her lying on the sofa, complaining and questioning.

seeing her indifferent, her mother's voice kept rising, and her questioning suddenly turned into merciless abuse.

when she got up and tried to leave the house to avoid the attack, her father kept threatening: "if you dare to leave, I will sever all relations with you."

for a while, roars and abuse broke out one after another in the small living room.

Liu Shan completely collapsed under the emotional attack of her parents saying, "go to hell."

she rushed out of the door crying and jumped to the edge of the pond, trying to resist her parents' attack with her death.

Don't underestimate the destructive power of "garbage emotion".

in every "emotional war" waged by parents, no matter who loses or wins in the end, it must be the child who hurts the most.

I have seen a doctor's share on the Internet before.

A grandmother took her 10-year-old grandson to him for advice: "the child is always sweating when he sleeps at night. He wants to see what's wrong."

after examination, he found that it was not a simple night sweat.

because every 20 or 30 seconds, the child will twitch violently all over, and his mouth and neck will always wiggle to one side.

and this symptom often occurs in children from an early age.

based on his many years of clinical experience, he came to the conclusion that the cause of the grandson's illness lies not in the body, but in the mood.

then Grandma suddenlyDawu claimed that the relationship between his son and daughter-in-law was particularly bad, and he often quarreled and divorced at home, making the family restless.

it turns out that the reason why children are used to night sweats and convulsions is the anger, apathy and attacks among adults, which deeply slander him and affect his body.

Children's hearts and bodies suffer far more from their parents' garbage emotions than their parents can imagine.

every time you yell, every anger seems insignificant;

it will flow into your child's body like chronic poison for years, eventually causing irreversible damage.

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psychologist Wu Zhihong said:

parents must learn to find a suitable outlet for release when emotions come, so as to avoid their children's calm handling.

Don't let your "garbage mood" hurt your child to pieces.


the family environment of garbage

is ruining children's concentration

often see backstage parents complain:

my children lose concentration as soon as they do their homework, can't sit still and run around.

my suggestion is to check whether there is something wrong with your living environment.

when I was a primary school teacher, I came into contact with a boy.

in the first grade of primary school, I often make trouble in class, kicking classmates' chairs and pulling the braids of their deskmates, so it is difficult to sit quietly in the chair for more than 5 minutes.

in order to understand the situation, I specially went to his home to visit.

I was startled as soon as I entered the door.

the place where he lives is not a home at all, but a small cloth workshop run by his parents.

near the door is the place where workers work and machines operate, and a partition is used at the back to separate the living space for a family of five.

when I walked in, all I heard was the sound of the cloth cutter, and all I saw were scraps of cloth that had been scattered all over the floor.

and the utility room where his desk is located is not only covered with cloth rubbish, but also can not stop the sound of the machine coming from outside.

how can a place like this, where I can't bear to stay for ten minutes, be suitable for a seven-year-old?

A disorderly and chaotic family can never raise a child with strong concentration, self-discipline and diligence.

when I was in junior high school, I especially liked to go to high achiever's house in my class.

it's not because her house is so much fun, but because she always feels very comfortable when she comes into her house.

as soon as she entered her house, all the places were in good order.

every time I go to her house, her mother will warmly receive our "little guests", and her father will come to chat with us and care about our situation.

her room is also clean and tidy. Studying in such a room is really not easy to be disturbed by the outside world, peace of mind, and it is easy to enter a state of focused learning.

the living environment of the family determines the child's happiness index and affects his future.

A disorderly home will only slightly overdraw the child's inner sense of order and energy.

only a clean and comfortable home can give the child a steady stream of motivation and energy, making him focused, self-motivated and self-disciplined.


Children are like parents

writer Leo Tolstoy said:

when children grow up in a "garbage dump", they will only become "waste" that will be eliminated and discarded by others.

only when parents take care of themselves and create a good family atmosphere for their children, can their children become excellent and self-disciplined.

Shandong sisters Hua Enhui and Enshi are "other people's children" in the hearts of many teachers and parents around them.

their personalities are optimistic, cheerful, industrious and capable, love reading, and their academic performance is particularly good.

all this is inseparable from my mother's good example.

the typhoon affected all the 100 mu of cornfields and 50 mu of lotus root ponds that the family had laboriously planted.

although my mother was distressed, she still smiled, did not complain, did not vent, and silently took the two sisters to clean up the mess.

I packed up and went home, cooking three meals a day for my family as if I had nothing to do.

the home is also spacious, bright, clean and comfortable, which is the happy little world that she and her husband strive to create for their daughters.

usually, she and her husband go shopping with their daughters whenever they have time.

every time I see a bookstore, I take my daughters in and stay for a long time, and the daughters are completely immersed in a sea of books.

behind an excellent child, there are often a pair of excellent parents.

every word and deed in parents' life is a specimen for their children to learn.