Don't be too "competitive" in one's life

/August 2022

there are always such people in life:

take trifles seriously, compete with innocuous people, stubbornly drill into the tip of their horns, turn themselves into twists, and turn their days into chicken feathers.

Zhou Guoping said: "A lot of pain in life comes from blind competition."

always cling to a little thing, let oneself tired, but also missed other colorful scenery, the loss outweighs the gain.

Don't be too "competitive" in your life.


not angry with the villain, because it is not worth

, everyone's cognitive level and self-cultivation connotation are very different.

Guo Degang has a saying that is very vivid: "the waves are big, I don't know what kind of seafood to blow up."

people meet thousands of people and speak ten thousand kinds of words in their whole life, all kinds of villains will encounter, all kinds of bad things will be seen.

if you care about everything and everyone is angry, I'm afraid it will be a painful day.

there is a very good saying:

I have heard such a story told by netizens:

when I was on a trip to the countryside, I met a monk speaking Buddhist sutras halfway up a famous mountain.

the monks dress simply and speak very simply, teaching people how to maintain peace of mind and avoid anxiety.

passers-by nodded frequently with relish.

but suddenly a young man with yellow hair appeared and ridiculed the monk loudly: "nonsense, it's not to cheat money," he said, holding up his milk tea and throwing it at the monk.

Milk tea hit the monk right on the body, and the dirty liquid dripped down the broad monk's clothes.

the monk looked calm and continued his lecture without even wiping it, as if it had not been affected at all.

The impressively beautiful cream marriage dress with lace is on the most affordable sale. Pefect for formal affairs or an informal ceremonies.

A bystander aunt thought that the monk would get angry and fight back. It was strange to see the other person's face. She asked the monk, "Master, aren't you angry?"

the monk smiled: "Why should I be angry?"

"that person spilled dirt on you and didn't suck at it," the aunt looked aggrieved.

the Master disagreed: "in his opinion, he humiliated me, but in my opinion, he humiliated himself."

as the saying goes, "often compete with the same people, but not with fools."

A quarrel will not solve the problem; if there is a fight, the other party will not raise awareness.

wasting my time, ruining my mood, and making myself a fool, the loss outweighs the gain.

can't you see that the dog barks at everyone, but no one barks at the dog?

Lincoln once said:

your life is so noisy that you really don't have to waste your energy on people who don't care, it's better to walk away.


I don't reason with my lover, because I hurt my feelings

. Apart from myself, the one who has spent the longest time with me is the one who walks through ravines and dangerous shoals together and experiences chicken feathers and pots and pans every day. We call them "lovers".

the reason why we add the word "love" in front of people is naturally to speak with love.

it's just that one of the stupid mistakes we often make is to be tolerant and polite outside, but to fight for right and wrong when we get home.

little do you know that when you reason at home and fight for right or wrong with your lover, you lose, and you win.

Yang Jiang once asked Qian Zhongshu, "Why do you give way to me every time you quarrel?"

Qian Zhongshu replied, "because you are mine, even if you win the quarrel, what can you do?" If I win the truth, lose my feelings, and lose you, I will lose my whole life. "

neighbor Xiaomei is a gentle and romantic girl who is planning her wedding and the wedding date is set on National Day. She was supposed to be a gorgeous bride-to-be, but she was not happy.

it turns out that Xiao Mei's husband is a man of science and technology, and his logical thinking is very rigorous. If there are any differences between the two, her husband will quote the classics and put forward a lot of reasons, hoping to convince Xiao Mei.

for the decoration of the new house, Xiao Mei wants to lay wood flooring, but her husband thinks that wooden flooring is not practical, sanitation and maintenance are very troublesome, and it is not as affordable as floor tiles.

then go on and on about the reason, from the properties of the plate to the warm structure of the ground.

Xiaomei wants to eat western food on the top floor of the central square and enjoy the rain. However, my husband counted how dangerous it is to travel on rainy days, how deep the water will be if he has to cross several underpass bridges.

Xiao Mei, who is extremely depressed, just hopes that her husband can coax her.

between husband and wife, there is not so much right and wrong, and there is no need to convince each other to prove themselves right. Learn to accommodate each other, you will gain more.

Home, not court; lover, not opposing lawyer.

hug the problem that can be solved, don't use your tongue; if the problem can be solved by emotion, don't use reason.

can protect a family who moves forward through wind and rain, flourishes, can support close lovers sharing weal and woe, white heads are inseparable, must be warm tolerance, not cold truth.

Don't let yourself be the "always right" loner for the rest of your life.


do not compete with yourself, because it is meaningless

there is a question on the Internet: "what is the experience of being obsessed too much?"

one of the answers is: "it's not easy to have a fire in your heart."

A lot of troubles in life stem from refusing to let yourself go and constantly wrestling with yourself.

most of the time, when you compete with yourself, you expect too much of yourself and stubbornly think that you can do it.Even better, I can't accept myself who is powerless, so draw a circle in my heart as a prison and bind myself.

Wu Xin once said frankly in a program: "the past three years have actually been very hard. I have been competing with myself and feel that I can do a lot of things."

nine times out of ten things go wrong in life. Don't be too serious, don't be too demanding, accept your imperfections, accept life's imperfections.

know yourself, accept yourself, let yourself go, and you will naturally have a different sea and sky.

Zhang Wenju, a master of calligraphy, dreamed of becoming a writer when he was young. To this end, he practices writing every day, writes constantly, and then sends manuscripts to different publishers.

although he worked hard, the manuscript was never hired.

finally, one day, he received a reply from the editor. Ecstatic, he quickly opened the letter, but the editor did not tell him that the manuscript had been hired, but told him that the pen handwriting was very good.

Zhang Wenju suddenly realized that maybe he is really not fit to be a writer. So he decisively gave up writing, began to practice calligraphy, and finally became a famous calligrapher.

Professor Li Meijin once said:

living a life is an Enron with a long flow of water, not a tense confrontation. If the heart is concerned, the sky is dark, and the heart is open, the wind is light and the clouds are light.

I am glad that Zhang Wenju is not blindly serious. Although he has one less writer, he has one more calligrapher.

Life is full of scenery, if you feel exhausted, then change direction, turn around, maybe it is willow and flowers.


Don't be too "competitive" in your life

whether you are happy or not is not how much wealth you have, but how comfortable your heart is.

Qian Zhongshu wrote in his book:

take a bath, look at a flower, eat a meal, if you feel happy, it is not all because the bath is clean, the flowers bloom well, or the dishes suit your taste, mainly because you have nothing on your mind.

in this life, don't live too "seriously". Let go of your obsession, don't worry about it, don't be disturbed by the noise of the world, don't be held back by worldly fame and fortune:

don't get angry with villains, feel refreshed;

don't reason with your lover, be at peace with your family;

don't compete with yourself and feel at ease.

as Zeng Guofan said, "if we do not welcome the future, we will not be mixed at that time, and we will not fall in love in the past."

for the rest of my life, I have nothing outside my heart. I watch the flowers bloom at leisure, leaving or staying unintentionally, waiting for the flowers to fall.